There has been a lot of different in the past few months. Things I want to get to, things I want to write about, but just haven’t had the words for yet. Things that need to be spoken, and will, but not in this post. Instead I want to talk about the after effects, the results of all that different. Because ultimately, the details don’t matter. We get caught up in the details and suddenly that story isn’t as inspirational, it isn’t as effective as we expected because his story is so much more different than ours. And her story, well its much worse than ours so how can I expect to compare. And all of the sudden the details distract, pervade, and ruin. So for now, can we all agree to not let the details matter?
Because the whole story is this: different came, and different went. And suddenly what I thought I knew wasn’t what I knew. Suddenly there was a whole lot of new to get used to. Different brought good, sure. But different also brought pain. Different brought confusion. Different brought irregular and changing paths. Different brought different. Not because the different was bad. On the contrary, it was something I had wanted so much. It was a different brought by God, designed for my good. But when God, the One who loves us most moves, you can most assuredly expect that the enemy, the One who hates us most, will also move.We can definitely expect it. After all, the enemy, He is the one who seeks, kills and destroys. But I suppose the problem was that while I expected it, I didn’t expect it to be hard. I suppose, rather than expecting a scene fit for the battlegrounds of war I expected something much more similar to the playgrounds of recess. I expected foam bullets. I expected something easily deflected. Something I could handle.I got comfortable, cocky, too confident in myself rather than in Him. And then, when the bullets came, they were definitely not foam. And this was no game found on the playground. This was a battle that did much worse than surprise. And those bullets. They were heavy, and strong and full of everything they are made to do. Those bullets, those bullets I didn’t quite anticipate, they pierced, they injured, they charged into me in a way I never expected. And suddenly all that different felt bad. And it felt wrong. And I felt bad. And I felt wrong.
And that is the part of the difference that is bothering me today. That detail. That surprise. Those after effects that affect us all. Maybe in different ways, but in ways nonetheless. The attack that came so subtly and so unexpected that suddenly I wasn’t just trying to digest the changes and the different but I was trying to digest the attacks and what that made me.
And so here I am. With a life full of different. With a life full of things I don’t quite know how to make sense of. And part of me wants so much to get back to the pattern, because it is easy. Part of me wants to once more see the world in my rose tinted glasses. Even though those glasses were old, and scratched, and actually quite harmful.
And I say all these thoughts in order to say this: Different is hard. Different is new. Different takes us by surprise often. Different is, well, different. But different is not bad. And different is not wrong. And even with all the after effects, Different is desirable. Because we are called to be different. Because He was different. And different is doable. Without the patterns. Without the foreknowledge. Without the ease. Because different will come. And the enemy will come with it. And it may catch you off guard, and it may bring wounds. And there may be a lot to learn and there may be a lot to work through. But different is not bad. And different is not wrong. Because different brings us closer to Him. He who, while He was praying…Became different. And while He was praying, the appearance of His face became different, and His clothing became white and gleaming. Different brings us closer to that. Different is what happened to Caleb. But My servant Caleb, because he has had a different spirit and has followed Me fully, I will bring into the land which he entered, and his descendants shall take possession of it. Different is what brought him into that land. Different is what brought all of the Israelite’s into that land. Those Israelite’s. Those people who were described by their enemy as a certain people scattered and dispersed among the peoples in all the provinces of [the] kingdom; their laws are different from those of all other people and they do not observe the king’s laws, so it is not in the king’s interest to let them remain. The enemy see’s different and decides it is in the best interest to not let us remain. Because when he see’s different, he see’s the very thing he hates the most. He see’s Christ. But different is not bad. And different is not wrong. Different is what brings us into that land. That land we all long for. Different is what changes us. Different is what makes us most like Him. So let difference come. Let it come, and perhaps the enemy will come with it. But we need not fear. Because different is from Him. Difference is from the Victor, the King of Kings, the Ancient of Days. Difference for you, Difference for me. Difference that takes us to the places of glory. Difference that takes us to the places we were called to. Difference that takes us to our purpose. Difference that takes us to Him. We need not fear the difference. Nor the after effects. They cannot harm us. We are protected. We are a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a peculiar people. A different people. A people that should show forth the praises of him who has called us out of darkness. Out of darkness and into his marvelous light.
Luke9:29| Numbers 14:24| Esther 3:8| I Peter 2:9